October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. For most of us, it passes as a purple ribbon on a lapel or a post in a feed. For the deputies, investigators and victim advocates of the Lexington County Sheriff’s Department, it is a reminder of the calls that come in every week of the year, from homes on quiet streets that look, from the outside, exactly like everyone else’s.
Domestic violence is the crime most likely to happen behind a closed door and least likely to be reported the first time. This month, we want to talk openly about what it looks like, what happens when someone in Lexington County calls for help, and what every one of us can do for a neighbor, a coworker or a family member who is living with it.
What the numbers say
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that more than 1 in 3 women and more than 1 in 6 men in the United States will experience intimate partner violence in their lifetime. It cuts across every income level, every neighborhood and every background.
South Carolina carries a heavier share than most. According to the South Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault, the state records roughly 30,000 cases of intimate partner violence each year, and in 2024 alone 59 people in South Carolina were killed by a partner or family member. For 23 of the past 25 years, South Carolina has ranked among the ten states with the highest rates of women killed by men.
Those are not statistics about somewhere else. Lexington County is home to more than 300,000 people, and the math is simple: some of them are reading this while living with it.
How Lexington County handles it differently
When the Charleston Post and Courier published its Pulitzer Prize-winning series “Till Death Do Us Part” on domestic violence in South Carolina, it described the Lexington County Sheriff’s Department as the lone bright spot in a state full of problems. That reputation was earned by investigators who follow up on every case, prosecutors who take them seriously and crime prevention officers who work to stop the next one before it happens.
It is also earned every day by the department’s Victims Assistance unit. Advocates review incident reports daily and reach out to victims directly, by phone or by mail, so no one has to navigate what comes next alone. They provide crisis intervention, help with orders of protection, guidance through the court process, referrals to specialized agencies and assistance with victim compensation. Their number is 803-785-8230, and calling it does not require you to have made a report yet.
What happens when you call
The most common reason people give for not calling is that they do not know what will happen if they do. Here is what to expect.
A deputy will respond and make sure everyone in the home is safe first. They will speak with each person separately, document any injuries and, if there is evidence a crime has been committed, make an arrest. In South Carolina, domestic violence charges are based on the severity of the incident, not on how many times it has happened before, so a first call can still lead to real consequences.
From there, a victim advocate follows up. You will be told when an arrest has been made and when the person is released, and you can register with SC SAVIN, the state’s free 24-hour notification service, at 1-866-727-2846 so you are never caught off guard.
What you will not get is judgment. Deputies respond to these calls constantly. They know how hard it is to make one, and they know that the first call is rarely the first incident.
Help is available tonight, not just in October
If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
If you need someone to talk to, a safety plan or a place to go, Sistercare serves Lexington County with emergency shelter, counseling, court advocacy and legal help, all confidential and free of charge. Their 24-hour crisis line is 803-765-9428.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available around the clock at 1-800-799-7233, or by texting START to 88788, and can connect you with resources anywhere in the country.
Every one of these services will talk to you whether or not you have decided to leave, and whether or not you have decided to involve law enforcement.
What the rest of us can do
Most people will never be the one calling 911 about their own home. Almost everyone, at some point, will know someone who should. Awareness is not a ribbon; it is knowing what to look for and what to do.
Watch for the signs. A friend who has stopped coming around, who checks in constantly with a partner, who has unexplained injuries or explains them too quickly, who has lost access to money, a car or a phone. None of these alone means abuse. Together, they are worth a conversation.
Say something, gently. “I’ve noticed you seem stressed lately. Is everything okay at home?” is enough. Do not push, do not give ultimatums and do not confront the abuser. Let them know you believe them and that you will help when they are ready.
Keep the numbers handy. Sistercare, the National Hotline and LCSD Victims Assistance are listed above. Saving them in your phone means you can pass them along without having to search for them in a hard moment.
And if you hear something happening next door, call 911. You do not have to be sure. Let a deputy find out.
Ready to answer the call yourself?
The deputies and advocates who respond to these calls chose this work because they believe someone should. If that sounds like you, the Lexington County Sheriff’s Department is hiring. Our team is built on four values: professionalism, compassion, honesty and relationships, and there are few places those values matter more than at the door of a home where someone has finally asked for help.
Visit JoinLCSD.com to learn more about a career with us and become part of a department that has been answering the call in Lexington County for more than 200 years.